I’ve Got AMD 

This song started as a joke after I’d come up with this term to describe what everybody I know had turned into. Now I realize it is as full of truth as anything I’ve written. 

 

I’ve got Facebook on my phone 

I always text when I’m alone 

I take a selfie with my spouse 

I’d Instagram if I knew how 

I’m on my phone for hours 

It’s become a part of me 

I’ve got A-M-D 

 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, we call it A-M-D 

We get it from our children, just like insanity 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, we want everything for free 

That sure as hell means music, we’ve all got A-M-D

 

Send me mail of some import 

But you’d better keep it short 

Too many words I lose the train 

Concentration’s such a strain 

My attention span’s gone AWOL 

My patience in full retreat 

I’ve got A-M-D 

 

I told my boss I need some space 

I trust this won’t affect my raise 

Just some time to find myself 

A month or three in San Miguel 

Don’t know why he’s grumpy 

It seems so fair to me 

I’ve got A-M-D 

 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, we call it A-M-D 

We get it from our children, just like insanity 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, we want everything for free 

No more morning paper, we’ve all got A-M-D 

 

Now I’m at Walmart every day 

Helping people find their way 

That’s ‘cause Starbucks told me no 

They said I’m cool but just too old 

Well, I‘m just like the kid they hired 

I got my masters in history 

I’ve got A-M-D 

 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, we call it A-M-D 

We get it from our children, just like insanity 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, we want everything for free 

Don’t need no stinking land line, we’ve all got A-M-D 

Acquired Millennial Disorder, my burger’s gluten-free, 

Just tell me that I’m awesome, ‘cause I’ve got A-M-D